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Monday, June 20, 2011

I'm MOVING !! :(

I've known for about a month now that I have to leave my home in sunny Los Angeles, California due to personal family issues, but it didn't really hit me until today. Because as of today, I only have one day left until I'm off to Canada where my mom lives. This whole week has been crazy. I've been running around, desperately trying to fit everyone into my schedule, hoping to spend as much time with them as possible before I leave. I am very much depressed about the whole situation. I am going to be leaving the home that I've lived in for basically all of my life. To make matters worse, my dad will be all alone in the house because he won't be coming with me to Canada, which saddens me. I love my dad and I can't imagine not living with him. My older sister is also not coming but she lives in another house with her husband and baby, which is another reason why I'm so very depressed. My sister is my best friend and I can't believe I won't be able to hang out with her anymore and I won't be able to see my nephew grow up. Not to mention, I'm leaving just before my senior year and I won't be able to see my closest friends, some of whom I have known since elementary school. Of course there is always Facebook, but it's just not the same. And I won't even be able to graduate with them!! :( But despite all of this, still I shed no tears. While my best friend literally cries every time the topic of me leaving comes up, my eyes don't even water. I know I'm sad, but why am I not sad enough to be able to cry? It makes me feel so heartless. Or maybe I am more terrified than sad. After all, this is the first time I ever move away, let alone move away to a different country! What if I make no friends? What if I freeze to death? I'm so used to LA's hot weather, which can be all the way up to 110 degrees in the summer and sometimes even in the winter. But I hear winters in Canada are brutal. How am I going to survive that?!? What's worse is that I have to live with my mom, who I do not get along with at all. Most of my life, I never really lived with her, but whenever she came to visit, we would always get in fights. -sigh- I don't know what I'm going to do. I guess I'll just have to take it day by day and hope for the best. Well, tomorrow's my flight. Wish me luck you guys!! :(

4 comments:

  1. I love your blog, I’m following!

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    ReplyDelete
  2. wow, you really have to go??? :(

    I would be terrified and excited at the same time. Yeah it's scary and sad to leave everything, but it's a whole new journey :) and I'm sure you'll make friends there :)

    good luck ;)

    -B-

    ReplyDelete
  3. Who knows you might really like it there. Good luck from me too!
    EM

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  4. i wish you luck jesayka.DO NOT WORRY AT ALL.things will change for the better.just smile:)

    ReplyDelete

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