Pages

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Whenever I want you, all I have to do is dream...

Canada is so different from California. Everything about it is different - the taste of the water, the attitude of the people, the look of the streets, and just the whole lifestyle. I'm not sure how I'll ever get used to it. The first four days I arrived, I cried and cried until there were no tears left in me. Before I left for Canada, I didn't shed a single tear about moving because it still did not feel like I was leaving. But the minute I left the airport and set my feet on the Canadian street was when it officially hit me that I was no longer in California and I no longer knew when I would see my sister and Dad. The first four days and nights were the absolute hardest to deal with. Nights were and still are absolutely unbearable because that's when I am all alone in dark, with nothing to think about but my sister, my dad, and my best friends who I may not see again until a few years later. For days I cried myself to sleep and I regret not taking advantage of the time when we were together. Mornings are just as brutal. Mostly because every night, for all the 10 days that I've been here, I have been dreaming about everyone back home. And when I wake up, I feel sadness overcome me once I realize I'm in Canada and not in California. But my dreams are both blessings and curses. A curse simply because it makes me feel worse once I wake up. However, it is also a blessing because I am at my happiest when I am asleep and dreaming. Because even for just a little while, I am back in California with all my friends and my family. It feels so real that I never want to wake up. It's so crazy how homesick  I am. I miss everything about California. But most of all I miss the little things like the tree outside my window, the sofa in the living room, and even my loud and obnoxious neighbors that used to annoy me so much. -sigh- I just wanna go home. I now understand how Sandy Cheeks from Spongebob Squarepants felt when she sang about how she misses Texas. If you're not familiar with it, well today's your lucky day because I put the video for it. (:

9 comments:

  1. :( I feel so bad for you... I think I would run back home :D

    but hey, the beginnings are always the hardest. I'm sure it will get better :)

    good luck.

    -B-

    ReplyDelete
  2. ooh, i remember the episode where Sandy was singing about Texas! i hope you get adjusted to your new home soon.
    thanks for following my blog :) you're really pretty. i think you look like Konkona Sen Sharma, one of my favourite Indian actresses. here's a picture of her:
    http://imovies4you.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/wakeupsid-video-songs.jpg

    ♥ much love!

    ReplyDelete
  3. aww.. it is okay!
    You would definitely get used to it, and who knows you may find some amazing friends here too ?
    and you could always be in touch with your old mates and meet them up during vacations.

    So smmillee :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. @Katt Lol. I look nothing like her! She's way too pretty!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey Jesayka, I just stopped by to let you know I have an award for you on my blog :)

    Thanks for you nice comments.

    -B-

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love, At least you get a new beginning. Something not everybody gets.

    Anthony
    http://informedteenpolitics.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  7. You have an amazing blog :) Followed. Check out mine? bhadrasblog-cricketfreak.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  8. it will get better! i was just in canada two weeks ago haha (:

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for taking the time to read my post. Your comments always put a smile on my face. <3